I find that I stumble upon interesting things through out the week and the best way to share them with you would be to make a little list! So here we go!
Book I am working on: Principles by Ray Dalio. I am a little less than a quarter of the way through, but this book has been phenomenal so far. I love learning about what makes people tick and how to create teams so this has been great for me. I highly recommend this if you are interested in exploring your principles more.
Article I have read recently: How Your Daily Routine Can Turn Into Your Biggest Enemy by Ryan Holiday. If you don’t already know, I really like Ryan Holiday and his books, especially Ego is the Enemy. If you need a little smack of humble, read it. Anyway, this article struck me as important because I am big into routines and usually if I get out of my routine I turn into a big grouch which isn’t pleasant for anyone. This was a little reminder that I should be more flexible in my day to day life and getting out of my routine shouldn’t throw me off the rails.
New music that I found: Somebody to Love by Abhi The Nomad. I heard this once on a random Spotify playlist and loved it. It is so catchy and has such a nice feel to hit. Such a good sunny, summer day song!
Fun exercises that I have been implementing: Ab’Asanas 2 created by Morgan Tyler. I have made it a point to work on core exercises daily since I recently realized that my weak core is the root of my back problems while lifting. This may seem like a ‘duh’ realization but I had thought for a long time that my back problems were caused by my form but after dedicating some time each day for core work, I have seen a reduction in my back pain and feel stronger! It is awesome! I just started practicing consistently this month and I am so happy.
Self care that I am experimenting with: massages! I had my first massage at the beginning of the year and it was an eye opener. I had no idea that my back, in particular my shoulders, were so tight! I decided after I came back from Arizona that I would start to get massages monthly and it has been a great experience so far. After one massage, I already feel a difference in my muscles! I also had my weak core revelation at my first appointment so I would say it has been a win win! If you have never had a massage, do it!
What are some things that you have come across this past week? Please share them in the comments!
Two weeks ago I happened to listen to two different podcasts that touched on positive body images. Whenever something like this happens, I feel like it is a sign. A little superstitious, I know. This had been on my mind because I have tracked macros for a year to monitor what I eat. Due to my Type A personality, I took a system that is supposed to optimally fuel your body and turned it into a negative experience. I would get really down on myself if I went over on my macros or went out to eat, making the entire experience not very enjoyable. This also transferred over into negative self talk and body image which equals high stress/unhappiness. I was thinking about food all of the time and how my eating style would help fix the things I did not like about myself. This is the farthest thing from being loving towards myself and eating to nourish my body. Listening to Starting the Conversation on Body Imagine from the CHAARG podcast and Dealing with Hormone Imbalances from Exercise from the PaleOMG podcast helped me realize that:
I desperately need a break from tracking my food
I have to work towards a happy body image
I have to find joy in exercising again instead of just using it as a means to eat “more” food
The amount of time I spent hating something small about my body took up too much of my time and energy when I could have been focusing on other things
Taking time to be nice to myself has helped in so so many ways. I can allow myself to appreciate how far I have come on my journey. I can enjoy food again instead of just thinking about how much or when I could eat. I am not having crazy binge episodes. I am sleeping better. I am in a happier mood. I am falling back in love with exercise and celebrating the small victories.
If you feel like you need a break from something, take it. Life is full of seasons and change. Just because you feel like you should be doing something doesn’t mean it is right at this time in your life. Remember to do what is good for you.
Have you ever experienced a vulnerability hangover? Where you open up to someone and after the fact completely regret what you did and feel like you want to hide? When I read about this is Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead by Brené Brown, I was pretty excited that she had put words to my feelings. I have certainly felt this way since I enjoy having more one-on-one serious conversations opposed to everyday small talk. I am not afraid to share things about myself in the moment, but later in the day I end up worrying about what that person may think of me and if I made the right choice. These occasions have brought about many questions concerning vulnerability and honestly, if it is worth it.
Daring Greatly touches on important points:
it takes courage to be vulnerable
people have to earn the right for you to be vulnerable with them
vulnerability is not a weakness
the only way to truly dissipate shame is to place the light of vulnerability upon it since shame thrives in the darkness
Learning more about vulnerability has opened my eyes to the importance of vulnerability with loved ones and in other situations. It is nice to know that if I start to doubt myself about opening up, that I can call upon courage for help. That each time I call upon courage, it grows. I cherish the moments where I do let myself open up and I am received with kindness and non-judgement. The relationships where I can share my stories continue to grow deeper each time.
Overall, I picked up Daring Greatly on the fly and I am so glad I did! If you are interested in learning more about vulnerability, wholehearted living, and shame research or you are trying to work up the courage to share your story with a loved one, I highly recommend this book. If you have read it before, let me know your thoughts in the comments! I leave you with a parting quote to encourage you to continue to go into the arena and dare greatly.
The Collection will be a series of short posts that detail something that I enjoyed during the week. I find that it is important and beneficial to observe what is around you and the content you are feeding yourself. So welcome to The Collection series!
Throughout this past year, I have really started to enjoy listening to podcasts while I am driving or working in the lab. I like that they help the time pass and make a seemingly monotonous task much more enjoyable. The Tim Ferriss Show has become my ‘go-to’ when I want something to chew on all week.
One of his recent podcasts was The Master of Second Chances with Catherine Hoke, the founder of Defy Ventures. Defy radically changes the lives of men and women that are or have been incarcerated by helping create career paths and business ventures. Now. You may be skeptical about this (as was I) but my opinion was completely turned around after listening to all of the wonderful things Defy is doing to help these people.
Throughout the entire podcast, Cat talks about forgiving yourself for your mistakes and breaking down self-limiting beliefs. I was so touched by this because I think everyone holds onto something that is limiting them in some way. Whether it is something that happened five years ago or yesterday, it is important to forgive yourself and work to not become defined by your past. You are in control of your actions and emotions to determine how you greet each new day.
Since I spent the entire week listening to this here and there, I spent a lot of time thinking about the negative self-talk that plays in my head. How am I negatively impacting my growth? What am I actively convincing myself that is not true? For example, if I am having a very bad day at the gym, I automatically start convincing myself that:
I am unteachable.
The effort I am putting in is worthless.
I am not making any progress.
Reading those thoughts in a centered state of mind makes me very upset. I know none of those thoughts define me, but when the negative self-talk starts to creep in, it is sometimes hard to push it out. I have worked to notice when I am telling myself a negative story so I can get out of that mindset as quickly as possible. I recognize that everyone has bad days and I am not always going to be the best I can be. That learning comes from the struggle and some days are going to be harder than others. On these days, I work to remind myself that I am enough. No matter how the day turns out, I am enough and did meaningful work today, no matter how small.
So what are your self-limiting beliefs? How are you not forgiving yourself? Take some time to think about these and meditate on them. Start forgiving and building yourself back up again.